Word Limits

Write a post on word limits.  Please take no more than 400 words.  You are allowed to deviate.

I’m writing a 1500 word philosophy essay at the last minute tonight, and I’m over the word count.  Do I care?  Not particularly.  Word counts annoy me.  In an ideal world, the number of words you use should be the number of words you need – no more, no less.  If someone is stupid enough to submit an essay of 100 words, then that’s their own fault.  Darwin’s Natural Selection will weed out the academic gene pool.  Just like natural selection will weed out the stupid kids from the not-so-stupid ones – that is what roads outside of schools are for, to get rid of the dumb ones!  And yet our government makes us slow down to a crawl outside every school.

The bane of my existence

And yes, once I have kids, I’m sure I’ll feel differently – but then I’ll be biased.  Just like power corrupts even the most honest of us, so do children corrupt our evolutionary viewpoints.  And no, I’m not suggesting that everyone go around targeting school children with their large SUV’s (I would never suggest that – not online anyways…), but we did survive as a country without the ridiculous speed limits near schools – it wasn’t all that long ago they were introduced, if I recall – during my lifetime, so that’s within the last twenty years (even though I’m only ten and holding).

Natural Selection in action - if you don't like it, blame Darwin

But perhaps my irritation at having to slow down is unfounded.  Perhaps I should take a “chill pill” (I hear they’re all the rage with polar bears), take things down a few notches, loosen up a bit, not worry about getting wherever I’m going in the shortest amount of time possible.

There is a simple solution, that will allow me to travel through school zones at the speed I want, and for the children to be protected – run school at night.  What else have the kids got to do?  Stay up and watch the horrendous advertisements on TV late at night?  And with the kids gone, and the parents home from work, more fun can be had by all.  Think of the boost in the population.  Think of the boost in the economy (especially with this recession).  Think of the boost to the world!  I see no disadvantages here.

Now to finish my essay…

Introductions

Hi there.  My name is Adam.  Would you like some candy?  I’ve got some waiting in the van with the tinted windows.  Just follow me.  What’s that?  Your parents told you not to follow strangers into vans with tinted windows?  Sigh.  Society is so hard on paedophilia nowadays.

The Paedo-Mobile

And no, I’m not a paedophile…only because I haven’t had the chance…  *ominous music*  Joking!  I would think that most males are paedophiles if you count the years of pre-age-of-consent masturbation.  If you count that, around 50% of the population have engaged in paedophiliac activities!  Of course, let us not be sexist – many that fall on the female side of the gender coin may have done similar things as well, although I’m not very au fait with female masturbation habits.  This sounds like a study in the making.

I recall seeing on A Current Affair or Today Tonight (two Australian “news” shows – you know the type, 3 or 4 news stories in half an hour, half of them about petrol prices, half of them about celebrity interviews, half of them about bad neighbours, half of them about scams, half of them about grocery prices, etc) (and yes I know those halves don’t add up) a story about a paedophile who had been released.  It wasn’t about the story of release, more that he had been placed near a school, if I recall correctly.  Or placed somewhere in society.  You could give a paedophile shelter in a uranium mine and people would still complain that they were “too near the power source for our nation” (not that we use nuclear power yet).  And so the media chased this poor man down the street, herding him into some random building and following him inside.  He had nothing much to say.  Eventually a prisoner-rights lawyer had to come along and tell the media to stick their cameras where the sun doesn’t shine (and I’m not talking about the dark side of the moon).  I thought this was a disgrace.

Not that I condone what this man did – I could never condone such a thing – but he had served his time in prison, paid his debt to society and all that.  And yet here he is being chased down the street by the media.  What is it about paedophilia that the media loves so much?  You don’t often see manslaughter-commiters being chased, or murderers even.

Today's Lingerie Model, Tomorrow's Rape Victim (and the Present's Gratituitous Pornography)

In fact, it would seem, at least from the impression that I get from the media, that activities such as paedophilia and rape are the most heinous crimes possible.  Why is this?  Last time I checked, rape and paedophilia victims usually lived to tell the tale.  Although this would seem fatuously true, now that I think about it.  The ones who didn’t live to tell the tale weren’t just rape victims, but murder victims one would assume.  But the media seems to insinuate that rape is worse than murder.  But is it?  A rape victim can go on to lead a relatively normal life (and I’m not trying to diminish their pain or suffering in any way).  A murder victim doesn’t have much chance of that.  Is torturing someone for a month worse than murdering them?  Torturing them for a year?

I have to admit that I’m completely ignorant of the sentences that Australian courts hand down in relation to such crimes, and whether a rapist is given more years in prison than a murderer.  I should probably get off my soapbox and check that out some day.  But at least where the media is concerned, rape and paedophilia seem more heinous than murder.  My suspicion is that this is the case for mainly one reason: dead people can’t talk.  Dead people can’t give emotional interviews that bring in the ratings.  Victims of rape can.  So can victims of paedophilia – Catholic church, anyone?  They do say that any publicity is good publicity, yes?

And this post has virtually done nothing to introduce me at all – so here’s a tidbit of personal info.  I’m currently writing a play – how about that?  Pretty nifty, right?  The guy’s an artist.  In fact, the guy’s not just an artist, he’s also a young man.  Here’s a portrait:

This is what is known in the business as a "punchline"

And that’s it for the moment.  Come back soon to read more posts whose titles have nothing to do with their content!